Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Bulls.
trousseau , appended the following postscript to her letter : — " I was so ashamed of the request I made you , that 1 sent after my messenger to get back my letter ; but he had already reached the post office and put it in before he could be overtaken . "
Not Themselves at all . —The following was perpetrated by a young Irish gentleman , who was anxious to meet a certain young Irish lady at the house of a lady friend . " But you know , " said the young fellow quite anxiously , " there is nothing in the world so embarrassing . I am sure that , under the circumstances , I wouldn't be myself , neither would she . "
A Good Inducement . —Another pair of lovers claim our attention . A young lady , less flustered than her admirer , addressed him in these terms : — " I like you exceedingly , but I cannot quit my home . I am a widow ' s only child , and no husband could possibly equal my parent in kindness . " " She may be kind , " replied her wooer enthusiastically , " but be my wife , and see if I don't beat your mother 1 "
Insomnia . —Most of our readers are familiar , no doubt , with the gallant young Irishman , who declared to his sweetheart that " he was in such a way about her he couldn't sleep at night for dreaming of her . " A parallel instance to this occurred when a poor fellow protested to " his girl" in the hayfield , that " his two eyes hadn't gone together all night for thinking about her . " " Very likely they did not , " she replied , " for I see your nose is between them . "
A Mixed Relationship . —In the city of Dublin once resided a humourous old beggar-woman who , whilst soliciting charity , declared " she was the mother of six small children and a sick husband . " Adducing a Reason . —A characteristic story is related of a poor Irishman who offered his only old saucepan for sale ; his children gathered round him and inquired why he did so . " Ah , my honeys , " said he , " sure I wouldn't be after partin' wid it if it wasn't to get some money to buy somethin' to put in it . "
Wide Awake . —It was in Dublin city that a good-humoured maid-of-all work , Molly , once related to her young mistress a most marvellous dream she bad had the previous night . " Pooh , Pooh 1 " cried the latter at its conclusion ; " you must have been asleep , Molly , when you dreamed such nonsense . " " Indeed , I was not then , " replied the indignant Molly , " I was just as wide awake as I am at this minute 1 "
Putting it to good use . —A Dublin porter was brought by his master before a magistrate on a charge of stealing chocolate , to which he could scarcely plead '' not guilty . " On being asked to whom he sold it , tbe pride of Patrick was exceedingly wounded . "To whom did I sell it ? " cried Pat . " Now , do you think 1 was so mane as to take it to sell ? " " Pray , then sir , " questioned the magistrate , " what did you do with it ? " " Do wid it 1 Well , then I took it home , and me and my ould ' omau made tay of it . "
A recommendation . —It was a Dublin spirit merchant who advertised that he had still on hand a small quantity of the whiskey which was drunk by George the Fourth when in Dublin . Good Material . —A draper once recommended a certain rich material for ladies' dresses to a customer . " Madam , " said he " it will wear for ever , and make a petticoat afterwards . "
Accommodating . —The draper , however , is almost out-done by an enterprising furrier , who intimates to all such ladies as desire genuine furs , that "he will make muffs , boas , & c , out of their own skins . " Quite Likely . —An English merchant gives us the following : —On examining a hogshead of hardware , and comparing it with the invoice , he found all right with the exception of one hammer , which had been omitted . "Oh , don't be unaisy , my dear sir , " cried his Irish porter ; " sure the man took it out to open the hogshead . "
An Auctioneer ' s Bull . —We cannot doubt the country of the auctioneer who , in recommending some mourning articles , innocently remarked , "Bedad , if my wife was a widder , I'd be buying these for her myself . " Anxious . —It is clear that the nationality of that servant may easily be assumed , who aroused his master at 4 a . m . instead of 6 , in order to tell him " he had two more hours to sleep . "
Left-handed . —A good story is told of a poor Irish servant-maid who vas left-handed . Placing the knives and forks upon the dinner-table in the same awkward fashion , her master observed that she had arranged them all left-handed . "Ah , true indeed , sir , " said she , " and so I have . Would you be pleased to help me to turn the table ? "
How to make sure . —A certain Irish attorney threatened to prosecute a Dublin printer for inserting the death of a living person , stating " that no printer should publish a death , unless informed of the fact by the party deceased . " An impossible task . —Two eminent members of the Irish bar ,
Doyle and Yelverton , quarrelled one day so violently that from hard words they came to hard blows . Doyle , the more powerful man of the two ( with his fists , at least ) knocked down his antagonist twice , vehemently exclaiming , " You scoundrel , I'll make you behave yourself like a gentleman I " To which Yelverton , rising , replied with equal indignation , "No , sir , never I defy you , I defy you ! You could not do it I "
He stood Mute . —It is stated that an Irish orator was once silenced with " inextinguishable laughter , " merely for saying , " I am sorry to hear my honourable friend stand mute . " ( To be continued ) . " Book of Rarities , " by Edward Roberts P . M
THE Midland Railway Company announces a series of excursions to different parts of Ireland , starting from St . Pancras on the 16 th , 18 th , 19 th and 24 th inst ., for periods of a fortnight each ; also to Scotland on Friday , the llth inst ., for 5 , 11 or IC days , or , at a single fare for the double journey , to return at any time within the sixteen days . On the same day the Company will also run an excursion for 11 or 16 days from St . Pancras to Northallerton , and other northern stations , while'the following day , Saturday , 12 th inst ., there will bo a general excursion to the chief towns served by the
Midland system , ranging from Birmingham , Nottingham , Derby , Burton , and Matlock to the Lake District , Liverpool , Manchester , & c . The weekly summer excursions for 3 , 8 , 10 , 15 or 17 days to the Isle of Man are to be continued until the 18 th inst ., and those for like periods to the chief towns of Lancashire until the 26 th , by which time we fear we shall have to regard the holiday season as drawing to a close , although there is little doubt but that the Midland and other Companies will have special trips whenever anything of an interesting character takes place within their district .
Bulls.
A three days' Masonic bazaar , held at Dundee , realised close on £ 750 , with many items still outstanding , and a large stock of unsold articles . It was hoped £ 1 , 000 would be secured by the gathering , and this is now regarded as likely to be tho
ultimate result . We have often refeiTed to the enthusiasm of our Scottish Brethren in these matters—the present is another illustration . Among those who took a leading part in the work of the bazaar were the Earl and Countess of Rosslyn .
In a recent number of " Square and Compass " ( Glasgow ) a Brofcher , in commenting on the rapid promotion of a member of the Lodge he was then visiting , stated that in his own Lodge , St . Michael ' s Kilwinning , No . 63 , ifc takes anyone aspiring for
the Eastern Chair ten years to get it . A type of Brethren we have come in contact with in India would think themselves overlooked completely if the position was not attained in a third that time . — " Indian Freemason . "
Ad01202
The Freemason ' s Chronicle . A Weekly Record of Masonic Intelligence . — : o : — Published every Saturday , Price 3 d . — : o : — THE FREEMASON'S CHRONICLE will be forwarded direct from the Office , Fleet Works , Bulwer Road , New Barnet , on receipt of remittance for the amount . The Terms of Subscription ( payable in advance ) are—Twelve Months , post free ... ... £ 0 13 6 Postal Order to he made payable to W . W . MORGAN , at the New Barnet Office . Cheques crossed "London and South Western Bank . " Scale of Charges for Advertisements . Per Page ... ... ... ... £ 10 10 0 Births , Marriage ^ , and Deaths , Is per line . General Advertisements , Trade Announcements , & c , narrow columns , 5 per inch . News column Advertisements Is per line . Special terms for series of insertions or special positions on application .
Ad01203
EVERY DESCRIPTION OF COMMEECIAL * PRINTING IN GOOD STYLE AND AT REASONABLE PRICES . Fleet Steam Printing Works , BULWER ROAD , NEW BARNET .
Ad01204
New Barnet School of Music , STATION BOAD , NEW BAENET . FOP all Particulars and Prospectus , apply to the Secretary . THB NEW BARNET SCHOOL OF MUSIC will be happy to provide high class entertainments and Ceremonial Music for Masonic Meetings , Consecrations , Installations and Ladies' Nights . For terms : —Bro . John Probert , Station Road , New Barnet , N .
The Theatres, &C.
The Theatres , & c .
• Globe . —8 , The Journey ' s End . 9 , Charley ' s Aunt . Matinee , Wednesday , 3 . Prince of Wales ' s . —8-15 , On the March . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Gaiety . —8-15 , My Girl . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Adelphi . —8 , Bovs Tosether .
Avenue . —8-15 , Monte Carlo . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Shaftesbury . —8 , The Little Genius . 10-15 , La Goulue . Duke of York ' s . —8 , The Gay Parisienne . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Lyric—8-15 , The Sign of the Cross . Matinee , Wednesday and Saturday , 2-30 . Savoy . —7 ' 30 , Weather or No . 8-30 , The Mikado . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Comedy . —8-10 , The Guinea Stamp . 9 , The Mummy . Criterion . —8-15 , Outward Bound . 8-45 , A Blind Marriage . Matinee , Saturdav . 2-30 .
Terry ' s . —8-15 , The Man in the Street . 8-50 , My Artful Valet . Matinee , . Wednesday , 3 . Opera Comique . —8 , Newmarket . Matinee , Wednesday and Saturday , 2 . Princess ' s . —8 , In sight of St . Paul ' s . Daly ' s . —8-15 , The Geisha ; A story of a Tea House . Matinee , Saturdav , 2-30 .
Vaudeville . —8-15 , Papa ' s wife . 9 , A night out . Matinee , Wednesday , 3 . Alhambra . —7-d 5 , Variety Entertainment . 8-15 , Irish Ballet Divertissement . 10 , Rip Van Winkle . 9-30 , The Animatographe . Empire . —7-40 , Variety Entertainment . New Ballet Divertissement , La
. Uanse . Uineinatographe . Second edition of Faust . Palace . —8-0 , Variety Entertainment , Tableaux Vivants , & c . Royal . —7-30 , Variety Company . Saturday , 2-30 . Oxford . —7-30 , Variety Entertainment . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Olympia . —Grand Pleasure Gardens . Variety Concerts , & c . Crystal Palace . —Varied attractions daily . Varieties , Seo . Royal Aquarium . —Open at 10 ; close at 11-30 , Constant Amusement . Tivoli . —7-30 , Variety Entertainment . . Saturday , 2-30 also . Mohawk Minstrels . —( Agricultural Hall . )—Daily . Madame Tussaud ' s ( Baker Street ) . —Open daily
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Bulls.
trousseau , appended the following postscript to her letter : — " I was so ashamed of the request I made you , that 1 sent after my messenger to get back my letter ; but he had already reached the post office and put it in before he could be overtaken . "
Not Themselves at all . —The following was perpetrated by a young Irish gentleman , who was anxious to meet a certain young Irish lady at the house of a lady friend . " But you know , " said the young fellow quite anxiously , " there is nothing in the world so embarrassing . I am sure that , under the circumstances , I wouldn't be myself , neither would she . "
A Good Inducement . —Another pair of lovers claim our attention . A young lady , less flustered than her admirer , addressed him in these terms : — " I like you exceedingly , but I cannot quit my home . I am a widow ' s only child , and no husband could possibly equal my parent in kindness . " " She may be kind , " replied her wooer enthusiastically , " but be my wife , and see if I don't beat your mother 1 "
Insomnia . —Most of our readers are familiar , no doubt , with the gallant young Irishman , who declared to his sweetheart that " he was in such a way about her he couldn't sleep at night for dreaming of her . " A parallel instance to this occurred when a poor fellow protested to " his girl" in the hayfield , that " his two eyes hadn't gone together all night for thinking about her . " " Very likely they did not , " she replied , " for I see your nose is between them . "
A Mixed Relationship . —In the city of Dublin once resided a humourous old beggar-woman who , whilst soliciting charity , declared " she was the mother of six small children and a sick husband . " Adducing a Reason . —A characteristic story is related of a poor Irishman who offered his only old saucepan for sale ; his children gathered round him and inquired why he did so . " Ah , my honeys , " said he , " sure I wouldn't be after partin' wid it if it wasn't to get some money to buy somethin' to put in it . "
Wide Awake . —It was in Dublin city that a good-humoured maid-of-all work , Molly , once related to her young mistress a most marvellous dream she bad had the previous night . " Pooh , Pooh 1 " cried the latter at its conclusion ; " you must have been asleep , Molly , when you dreamed such nonsense . " " Indeed , I was not then , " replied the indignant Molly , " I was just as wide awake as I am at this minute 1 "
Putting it to good use . —A Dublin porter was brought by his master before a magistrate on a charge of stealing chocolate , to which he could scarcely plead '' not guilty . " On being asked to whom he sold it , tbe pride of Patrick was exceedingly wounded . "To whom did I sell it ? " cried Pat . " Now , do you think 1 was so mane as to take it to sell ? " " Pray , then sir , " questioned the magistrate , " what did you do with it ? " " Do wid it 1 Well , then I took it home , and me and my ould ' omau made tay of it . "
A recommendation . —It was a Dublin spirit merchant who advertised that he had still on hand a small quantity of the whiskey which was drunk by George the Fourth when in Dublin . Good Material . —A draper once recommended a certain rich material for ladies' dresses to a customer . " Madam , " said he " it will wear for ever , and make a petticoat afterwards . "
Accommodating . —The draper , however , is almost out-done by an enterprising furrier , who intimates to all such ladies as desire genuine furs , that "he will make muffs , boas , & c , out of their own skins . " Quite Likely . —An English merchant gives us the following : —On examining a hogshead of hardware , and comparing it with the invoice , he found all right with the exception of one hammer , which had been omitted . "Oh , don't be unaisy , my dear sir , " cried his Irish porter ; " sure the man took it out to open the hogshead . "
An Auctioneer ' s Bull . —We cannot doubt the country of the auctioneer who , in recommending some mourning articles , innocently remarked , "Bedad , if my wife was a widder , I'd be buying these for her myself . " Anxious . —It is clear that the nationality of that servant may easily be assumed , who aroused his master at 4 a . m . instead of 6 , in order to tell him " he had two more hours to sleep . "
Left-handed . —A good story is told of a poor Irish servant-maid who vas left-handed . Placing the knives and forks upon the dinner-table in the same awkward fashion , her master observed that she had arranged them all left-handed . "Ah , true indeed , sir , " said she , " and so I have . Would you be pleased to help me to turn the table ? "
How to make sure . —A certain Irish attorney threatened to prosecute a Dublin printer for inserting the death of a living person , stating " that no printer should publish a death , unless informed of the fact by the party deceased . " An impossible task . —Two eminent members of the Irish bar ,
Doyle and Yelverton , quarrelled one day so violently that from hard words they came to hard blows . Doyle , the more powerful man of the two ( with his fists , at least ) knocked down his antagonist twice , vehemently exclaiming , " You scoundrel , I'll make you behave yourself like a gentleman I " To which Yelverton , rising , replied with equal indignation , "No , sir , never I defy you , I defy you ! You could not do it I "
He stood Mute . —It is stated that an Irish orator was once silenced with " inextinguishable laughter , " merely for saying , " I am sorry to hear my honourable friend stand mute . " ( To be continued ) . " Book of Rarities , " by Edward Roberts P . M
THE Midland Railway Company announces a series of excursions to different parts of Ireland , starting from St . Pancras on the 16 th , 18 th , 19 th and 24 th inst ., for periods of a fortnight each ; also to Scotland on Friday , the llth inst ., for 5 , 11 or IC days , or , at a single fare for the double journey , to return at any time within the sixteen days . On the same day the Company will also run an excursion for 11 or 16 days from St . Pancras to Northallerton , and other northern stations , while'the following day , Saturday , 12 th inst ., there will bo a general excursion to the chief towns served by the
Midland system , ranging from Birmingham , Nottingham , Derby , Burton , and Matlock to the Lake District , Liverpool , Manchester , & c . The weekly summer excursions for 3 , 8 , 10 , 15 or 17 days to the Isle of Man are to be continued until the 18 th inst ., and those for like periods to the chief towns of Lancashire until the 26 th , by which time we fear we shall have to regard the holiday season as drawing to a close , although there is little doubt but that the Midland and other Companies will have special trips whenever anything of an interesting character takes place within their district .
Bulls.
A three days' Masonic bazaar , held at Dundee , realised close on £ 750 , with many items still outstanding , and a large stock of unsold articles . It was hoped £ 1 , 000 would be secured by the gathering , and this is now regarded as likely to be tho
ultimate result . We have often refeiTed to the enthusiasm of our Scottish Brethren in these matters—the present is another illustration . Among those who took a leading part in the work of the bazaar were the Earl and Countess of Rosslyn .
In a recent number of " Square and Compass " ( Glasgow ) a Brofcher , in commenting on the rapid promotion of a member of the Lodge he was then visiting , stated that in his own Lodge , St . Michael ' s Kilwinning , No . 63 , ifc takes anyone aspiring for
the Eastern Chair ten years to get it . A type of Brethren we have come in contact with in India would think themselves overlooked completely if the position was not attained in a third that time . — " Indian Freemason . "
Ad01202
The Freemason ' s Chronicle . A Weekly Record of Masonic Intelligence . — : o : — Published every Saturday , Price 3 d . — : o : — THE FREEMASON'S CHRONICLE will be forwarded direct from the Office , Fleet Works , Bulwer Road , New Barnet , on receipt of remittance for the amount . The Terms of Subscription ( payable in advance ) are—Twelve Months , post free ... ... £ 0 13 6 Postal Order to he made payable to W . W . MORGAN , at the New Barnet Office . Cheques crossed "London and South Western Bank . " Scale of Charges for Advertisements . Per Page ... ... ... ... £ 10 10 0 Births , Marriage ^ , and Deaths , Is per line . General Advertisements , Trade Announcements , & c , narrow columns , 5 per inch . News column Advertisements Is per line . Special terms for series of insertions or special positions on application .
Ad01203
EVERY DESCRIPTION OF COMMEECIAL * PRINTING IN GOOD STYLE AND AT REASONABLE PRICES . Fleet Steam Printing Works , BULWER ROAD , NEW BARNET .
Ad01204
New Barnet School of Music , STATION BOAD , NEW BAENET . FOP all Particulars and Prospectus , apply to the Secretary . THB NEW BARNET SCHOOL OF MUSIC will be happy to provide high class entertainments and Ceremonial Music for Masonic Meetings , Consecrations , Installations and Ladies' Nights . For terms : —Bro . John Probert , Station Road , New Barnet , N .
The Theatres, &C.
The Theatres , & c .
• Globe . —8 , The Journey ' s End . 9 , Charley ' s Aunt . Matinee , Wednesday , 3 . Prince of Wales ' s . —8-15 , On the March . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Gaiety . —8-15 , My Girl . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Adelphi . —8 , Bovs Tosether .
Avenue . —8-15 , Monte Carlo . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Shaftesbury . —8 , The Little Genius . 10-15 , La Goulue . Duke of York ' s . —8 , The Gay Parisienne . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Lyric—8-15 , The Sign of the Cross . Matinee , Wednesday and Saturday , 2-30 . Savoy . —7 ' 30 , Weather or No . 8-30 , The Mikado . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Comedy . —8-10 , The Guinea Stamp . 9 , The Mummy . Criterion . —8-15 , Outward Bound . 8-45 , A Blind Marriage . Matinee , Saturdav . 2-30 .
Terry ' s . —8-15 , The Man in the Street . 8-50 , My Artful Valet . Matinee , . Wednesday , 3 . Opera Comique . —8 , Newmarket . Matinee , Wednesday and Saturday , 2 . Princess ' s . —8 , In sight of St . Paul ' s . Daly ' s . —8-15 , The Geisha ; A story of a Tea House . Matinee , Saturdav , 2-30 .
Vaudeville . —8-15 , Papa ' s wife . 9 , A night out . Matinee , Wednesday , 3 . Alhambra . —7-d 5 , Variety Entertainment . 8-15 , Irish Ballet Divertissement . 10 , Rip Van Winkle . 9-30 , The Animatographe . Empire . —7-40 , Variety Entertainment . New Ballet Divertissement , La
. Uanse . Uineinatographe . Second edition of Faust . Palace . —8-0 , Variety Entertainment , Tableaux Vivants , & c . Royal . —7-30 , Variety Company . Saturday , 2-30 . Oxford . —7-30 , Variety Entertainment . Matinee , Saturday , 2-30 . Olympia . —Grand Pleasure Gardens . Variety Concerts , & c . Crystal Palace . —Varied attractions daily . Varieties , Seo . Royal Aquarium . —Open at 10 ; close at 11-30 , Constant Amusement . Tivoli . —7-30 , Variety Entertainment . . Saturday , 2-30 also . Mohawk Minstrels . —( Agricultural Hall . )—Daily . Madame Tussaud ' s ( Baker Street ) . —Open daily