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Article HUMOROUS ACCOUNT OF VENICE. Page 1 of 1
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Humorous Account Of Venice.
HUMOROUS ACCOUNT OF VENICE .
HPHE situation of the once flourishing Republic of Venice , and it * ¦ *• new democracy , under the controul of the French General , is described with some degree of humour in the following letter : DON PANTALOON TO THE EDITOR OF THE SCIENTIFIC MAGAZINE . * SIR , " If you have ever read an Italian comedyyou must knowthat
, , the Pantaloons are" an ancient and noble family , who have been famous in all ages for pretty daughters , knavish servants , and a large estate . I am one of their descendants ; but what has befallen me is diametrically opposite to the rules of the Drama . ' I have only one daughter , who is such a beauty , that I christened her Venice : for a nobleman , who has never left the city of Venice ,
cannot conceive any thing more beautiful than it is . A gentleman , whose name is Mr . Spread-Eagle , has long had an inclination to marry my daughter , in order to get possession of some of her estate , which lies contiguous to his own ; but the match never pleased me . A young Captain , however , whose only fortune lay in his sword , has lately become enamoured of Venice , and he began his courtshi p by
attacking Mr . Spread-Eagle . Both of them called on me to second them ; but I held back , and lent neither party any assistance . The two rivals , after some contest , embraced and became friends , at the expenceof my unfortunate daughter . The Captain ravished her , took possession of her money and jewels , set her tenants against her , and seized her lands . These lands he made a present of to . Mr . Spread-Eagle , and I was forced to consent .
'My unhappy girl , robbed and ravished , can now no longer be said to belong to herself , to me , nor to any one else . Besides this , her constitution is destroyed , and the course which is pursued with her , must infallibly occasion her death . Her physician resembles Sganarelle ( the Doctor Last of the French Theatre ) ; if they do not place the heart on the right side , they at least put the heels where the head should beand consequently the head in the place of the
, heels . My daughter , in a state of stupor , has not even strength left her to complain ; she smiles at the quacks , who attend her , because she knows that they are employed by the Captain . ' These quacks interfere in every thing ; even in the arrangement of my household . Conceive , Sir , what it must be , when they have forbidden me to turn away my servants ; though Harlequina
Ber-, gamese patriot , is continually robbing my cellar and kitchen ; and . Scapio , a patriot of Bologna , is a spy over me , and sends an account of every supper I eat , to the destroyer of my unhappy Venice . ' All this , I assert , is contrary to the rules of the Drama , and what Moliere nor Goldoni ever thought of . Formerly Pantaloons had nothing to apprehend but from intrigues ; but cannon is a thing new to
them . In an entertainment which begins with the tocsin , and ends with a discharge of artillery , God help those young women Who resemble Venice , and those noblemen , who , like the Pantaloon , have great estates . '
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Humorous Account Of Venice.
HUMOROUS ACCOUNT OF VENICE .
HPHE situation of the once flourishing Republic of Venice , and it * ¦ *• new democracy , under the controul of the French General , is described with some degree of humour in the following letter : DON PANTALOON TO THE EDITOR OF THE SCIENTIFIC MAGAZINE . * SIR , " If you have ever read an Italian comedyyou must knowthat
, , the Pantaloons are" an ancient and noble family , who have been famous in all ages for pretty daughters , knavish servants , and a large estate . I am one of their descendants ; but what has befallen me is diametrically opposite to the rules of the Drama . ' I have only one daughter , who is such a beauty , that I christened her Venice : for a nobleman , who has never left the city of Venice ,
cannot conceive any thing more beautiful than it is . A gentleman , whose name is Mr . Spread-Eagle , has long had an inclination to marry my daughter , in order to get possession of some of her estate , which lies contiguous to his own ; but the match never pleased me . A young Captain , however , whose only fortune lay in his sword , has lately become enamoured of Venice , and he began his courtshi p by
attacking Mr . Spread-Eagle . Both of them called on me to second them ; but I held back , and lent neither party any assistance . The two rivals , after some contest , embraced and became friends , at the expenceof my unfortunate daughter . The Captain ravished her , took possession of her money and jewels , set her tenants against her , and seized her lands . These lands he made a present of to . Mr . Spread-Eagle , and I was forced to consent .
'My unhappy girl , robbed and ravished , can now no longer be said to belong to herself , to me , nor to any one else . Besides this , her constitution is destroyed , and the course which is pursued with her , must infallibly occasion her death . Her physician resembles Sganarelle ( the Doctor Last of the French Theatre ) ; if they do not place the heart on the right side , they at least put the heels where the head should beand consequently the head in the place of the
, heels . My daughter , in a state of stupor , has not even strength left her to complain ; she smiles at the quacks , who attend her , because she knows that they are employed by the Captain . ' These quacks interfere in every thing ; even in the arrangement of my household . Conceive , Sir , what it must be , when they have forbidden me to turn away my servants ; though Harlequina
Ber-, gamese patriot , is continually robbing my cellar and kitchen ; and . Scapio , a patriot of Bologna , is a spy over me , and sends an account of every supper I eat , to the destroyer of my unhappy Venice . ' All this , I assert , is contrary to the rules of the Drama , and what Moliere nor Goldoni ever thought of . Formerly Pantaloons had nothing to apprehend but from intrigues ; but cannon is a thing new to
them . In an entertainment which begins with the tocsin , and ends with a discharge of artillery , God help those young women Who resemble Venice , and those noblemen , who , like the Pantaloon , have great estates . '