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Article MASONIC REMINISCENCES. ← Page 3 of 8 →
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Masonic Reminiscences.
of it , the thought struck me that if horses can be affiictea with it , asses might . " " Certainly" said the innocent and unsuspecting Phil , but won't Dr . —know . " " No , he never allows an idea of common sense , or of common subjects to enter his head , he knows nothing but mathematics , and his head is so stuffed with triangles , and curves , and polygons , and powers , that there is scarcely room for any useful idea to enter there , and if an
acute notion should happen to stray into that lumber room , his scull , it would be sure to come out so obtuse as to be unintelligible . " " But , cousin , you ' re a fine stout fellow just eighteen , and have seen nothing of the town as yet , what say you to a peep at it this evening ; it will brighten you up a bit , and as you don't seem to relish musty old bookswe'll see what you can do in the fighting and drinking line . " Phil
, looked shocked and alarmed . " 0 , my dear fellow , I only joke , I mean a mere lark , I hope that old curmudgeon , your uncle , is not in the way , by the by , how are you off in the way of tin ?"—Phil stared , — " I mean have you got any money ? " " Oh ! yes , my uncle gave me a ten pound note for pocket money , and mamma gave me a purse which she hoped I shoidd not require , and which I am not to open till all my other money shall be
spent . " " All right , there is a' strong probability that we'll investigate its contents in the course of the evening ; as for me the governor and I are not on the best terms in the world , and he keeps me so tight-reined in the cash department , that you might generally dance a fandango through my pockets without running the risk of tripping against the minutest of Her Majesty ' s pictures .
"Now then go and doff your cap and gown , and with it that lachrymose face , polish yourself up a little , and be back as soon as you can , I shall be ready , we shall dine in town , and see what ' s to be done in the evening . You can leave that ten pound note on the table , we shall want small change , and it is not considerate to put persons , to toliom you should happen to oice a small balance , to the trouble of making returns of surplusses .
I shall therefore go to the great chemical establishment over the way , ( once the proud senate house * of the nation whose echoes were so often awakened by the immortal genius of Grattan ) and have it put through the analytic process , they are powerful alchemists there—they can change dirty paper into gold . " Phil placed the note on the tablemerely remarking that mamma
re-, quested he should be able to give a precise account of the manner in which he disposed of his money , and added , " Shall I inform her that you kindly consented to be my banker . " Jack ' s face of puzzled comicality was a beautiful illustration of the absurdit y of his becoming any body ' s banker , "No , no , you must not say that ; let me see , you can tell her that you expended your extra money on lessons in gastronomyand gymnastics
, , two branches of polite learning not included in the curriculum , but without some knowledge of which a young gentleman ' s education would be rather imperfect . " Phil , though somewhat perplexed , thought it must be all quite right , and
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Masonic Reminiscences.
of it , the thought struck me that if horses can be affiictea with it , asses might . " " Certainly" said the innocent and unsuspecting Phil , but won't Dr . —know . " " No , he never allows an idea of common sense , or of common subjects to enter his head , he knows nothing but mathematics , and his head is so stuffed with triangles , and curves , and polygons , and powers , that there is scarcely room for any useful idea to enter there , and if an
acute notion should happen to stray into that lumber room , his scull , it would be sure to come out so obtuse as to be unintelligible . " " But , cousin , you ' re a fine stout fellow just eighteen , and have seen nothing of the town as yet , what say you to a peep at it this evening ; it will brighten you up a bit , and as you don't seem to relish musty old bookswe'll see what you can do in the fighting and drinking line . " Phil
, looked shocked and alarmed . " 0 , my dear fellow , I only joke , I mean a mere lark , I hope that old curmudgeon , your uncle , is not in the way , by the by , how are you off in the way of tin ?"—Phil stared , — " I mean have you got any money ? " " Oh ! yes , my uncle gave me a ten pound note for pocket money , and mamma gave me a purse which she hoped I shoidd not require , and which I am not to open till all my other money shall be
spent . " " All right , there is a' strong probability that we'll investigate its contents in the course of the evening ; as for me the governor and I are not on the best terms in the world , and he keeps me so tight-reined in the cash department , that you might generally dance a fandango through my pockets without running the risk of tripping against the minutest of Her Majesty ' s pictures .
"Now then go and doff your cap and gown , and with it that lachrymose face , polish yourself up a little , and be back as soon as you can , I shall be ready , we shall dine in town , and see what ' s to be done in the evening . You can leave that ten pound note on the table , we shall want small change , and it is not considerate to put persons , to toliom you should happen to oice a small balance , to the trouble of making returns of surplusses .
I shall therefore go to the great chemical establishment over the way , ( once the proud senate house * of the nation whose echoes were so often awakened by the immortal genius of Grattan ) and have it put through the analytic process , they are powerful alchemists there—they can change dirty paper into gold . " Phil placed the note on the tablemerely remarking that mamma
re-, quested he should be able to give a precise account of the manner in which he disposed of his money , and added , " Shall I inform her that you kindly consented to be my banker . " Jack ' s face of puzzled comicality was a beautiful illustration of the absurdit y of his becoming any body ' s banker , "No , no , you must not say that ; let me see , you can tell her that you expended your extra money on lessons in gastronomyand gymnastics
, , two branches of polite learning not included in the curriculum , but without some knowledge of which a young gentleman ' s education would be rather imperfect . " Phil , though somewhat perplexed , thought it must be all quite right , and