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Article LONDON PLATITUDES. ← Page 5 of 13 →
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London Platitudes.
As I stood irresolute , lie continued : —¦ "Don ' t pass , your honour , till the way ' s clear . 'Tain ' fc always like this ; the 'busses will have their way , and it ' s of no use contradicting them . Got a copper , your honour , this morning , for Poor Jack ?" The godfathers and godmothers of crossing- ers seem
sweep to be sadly wanting in richness and variety of names . Every third brother of the broom of my acquaintance is a Jack , and not only a Jack , but a poor Jack . " You make a good many coppers , I imagine , on a dirty day , " said I , drawing a little aside to await my turn at the crossing .
"Not half enough , your honom ' , " replied he . "The people ' s in too great a hurry to mind the sweeper . But I forgive it ' em , sir , cos I see they don ' t attend . I tell ye wot aggrivates me : to see a great fat hulker of a alderman , w ot takes up all my crossing come sweeping across it , and not minding I no more than the lamppust ! We ' re not
fourfooted creeters , sir , and we pays for our eating . D ' ye know what brought me here , sir ? ( don ' t venture yet , yer honour , ) ' twas cur ' osity . I had as nice a sweep ( there ' s two 'busses a drivin' down like winkin' ) , as nice a sweep as ever a chap was born'd to , but ( take care , sir ) it war too quiet—too quiet and philosophical : I couldn ' t stand it—a precise man
with spectacles wot passed me every day , quite did me up . I fell into a bucolical state , sir ; lost flesh , sir , and grew as thin as my broom . Here ' s two Elephants and a Woxhall , and they'll be spinning that old woman as sure as a turnup ! Here ' s the world to be seen here , sir , and plenty o' wariety . I likes the noise . I likes the coppers . Nowsirthem
car-, , riages have driv'd up Cockspur-street . Now ' s your time , ma ' am . Don ' t go to be afeard , my lady . That chap won ' t be here till to-morrow morning . Cuss that butcher ' s boy ! don ' t step , or you'll be upon him . Got a copper , sir ? Svep it werry clean , wery perticular clean . Be smart , marm ! My eyehow she cuts ! there ' s a splash upon her stocking !
, Thankee , sir . I hopes as how to see your good-looking face again , sir !" I gave my pilot a dim halfpenny , went on my way , and , as Christian in the " Pilgrim ' s Progress" says , " rejoicing . "
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
London Platitudes.
As I stood irresolute , lie continued : —¦ "Don ' t pass , your honour , till the way ' s clear . 'Tain ' fc always like this ; the 'busses will have their way , and it ' s of no use contradicting them . Got a copper , your honour , this morning , for Poor Jack ?" The godfathers and godmothers of crossing- ers seem
sweep to be sadly wanting in richness and variety of names . Every third brother of the broom of my acquaintance is a Jack , and not only a Jack , but a poor Jack . " You make a good many coppers , I imagine , on a dirty day , " said I , drawing a little aside to await my turn at the crossing .
"Not half enough , your honom ' , " replied he . "The people ' s in too great a hurry to mind the sweeper . But I forgive it ' em , sir , cos I see they don ' t attend . I tell ye wot aggrivates me : to see a great fat hulker of a alderman , w ot takes up all my crossing come sweeping across it , and not minding I no more than the lamppust ! We ' re not
fourfooted creeters , sir , and we pays for our eating . D ' ye know what brought me here , sir ? ( don ' t venture yet , yer honour , ) ' twas cur ' osity . I had as nice a sweep ( there ' s two 'busses a drivin' down like winkin' ) , as nice a sweep as ever a chap was born'd to , but ( take care , sir ) it war too quiet—too quiet and philosophical : I couldn ' t stand it—a precise man
with spectacles wot passed me every day , quite did me up . I fell into a bucolical state , sir ; lost flesh , sir , and grew as thin as my broom . Here ' s two Elephants and a Woxhall , and they'll be spinning that old woman as sure as a turnup ! Here ' s the world to be seen here , sir , and plenty o' wariety . I likes the noise . I likes the coppers . Nowsirthem
car-, , riages have driv'd up Cockspur-street . Now ' s your time , ma ' am . Don ' t go to be afeard , my lady . That chap won ' t be here till to-morrow morning . Cuss that butcher ' s boy ! don ' t step , or you'll be upon him . Got a copper , sir ? Svep it werry clean , wery perticular clean . Be smart , marm ! My eyehow she cuts ! there ' s a splash upon her stocking !
, Thankee , sir . I hopes as how to see your good-looking face again , sir !" I gave my pilot a dim halfpenny , went on my way , and , as Christian in the " Pilgrim ' s Progress" says , " rejoicing . "