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Article A QUEER CAREER. ← Page 6 of 13 →
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A Queer Career.
or tried to whop , Her Majesty ' s " Snappers and Grinders , " if they could find occasion to make a quarrel , which , be assured , was no difficult matter , whenever , whether at Woolwich or Chatham , or elsewhere , Queen's Service Sappers encountered the Engineers of John Company . HE was in a coatee . He had two large golden epaulettes . He wore the orthodox
broad-spreading-at-the-top ostentatious peak-shading-at-the-base shako . Mr . Mole had the inverted stripes of a staff-sergeant on his arm , and he carried a rattan , the privilege of his non-commissioned rank . He beamed airily upon me as if he recognised one he had seen somewhere before ; but he cast languishing glances at the demure servant maids of the St . Margaret ' s Bank establishments , aud obviously , to employ an oriental metaphor , their hearts " melted as water before the warmth of lord ' s smile . "
my I didn't find my friend the purser's clerk , but I did eat good cheesecakes at the " Eose " at Sittingbourne—the world-renowned speciality of that long since nonexistent hostelry—that night , to which I had carried nine miles more white Kentish dust , and I forgot all about Mr . Mole until—until our next encounter .
And ever after that interview he wore the chimney-pot capital I have heretofore described . This is the last time , dear and patient reader , you shall behold him without that churchwarden or dissenting-minister-like voucher of indisputable respectability . On this occasion he had covered his nut with a pork pie , or—so-called—polo , head gear , and he was addressing a numerous and admiring audience in the New Cut ; Lambeth . It was early in ' 51 , the Exhibition year . I am sure I don't know what took me to
that aristocratic South London thoroughfare . Perhaps I was wending my way to a temperance meeting in the Westminister Bridge road . Probably I was seeking spiritual consolation at the late Mr . Eowland Hill's Tabernacle , over against the gilded clog licking out the golden pot—the hundreds of years old "dog and pot "—in the way leading to the whilom Magdalen , and the still standing Obelisk . Ascribe to me any dissipated intentions you pleaseanyhow it was Saturday nihtand it was in the New
, g , Cut , and there was a crowd ! Now , if there is one temptation of London street life I never COULD resist , it is a crowd . What is it all about ? I must know . I elbow my way in . If it ' s an argument , I take a part in it . If it's a sight , I look on and applaud . If it ' s " Punch , " I grin , and cheerfully give my penny . If it ' s a fight , I—well , sometimes—interpose between the stripped ' gladiators—take each athlete by the throat—announce that I am a metropolitan
ratepayer—invoke the vestry , the Board of Works , the police and the authorities generally , and pose as Ajax defying the lightning . But this particular crowd was quite amicable . It was clustered around an individual who was civilian as to all parts of his garb but his head covering , and that was adorned by an unmistakable forage or stable cap . It was my acquaintance , Mr . Mole . He occasionally produced from his waistcoat pocket certain diminutive pill boxes—he very ostentatiously displayed a black-handled razor , a strop , and a jagged piece of deal wood —and this is the way in which he addressed his numerous and obviously admiring auditory , —
" Gentlemen , —for it would be in vain to appeal to the sympathies of the softer sex , in a matter in which , by the immutable laws of nature , they cannot be interested , —I am no common man ! I hold in my hand an implement—of domestic—ordinary domestic—employment , commonly termed—a—a—razor ! Gentlemen , the hand which now brandishes this weapon knows little about such plebeian tools . No , gentlemen , I am more accustomed to the use of a car-r-r-bine—a lance—or a swo-r-r-rd . I do not
boast . Let the Gazettes which record—alas ! inadequately record—the exploits of Ferozeshah , Sobraon and Aliwal be consulted , and if the name of "Vi gilance Jollybodycorporal of the 16 th Lancers—be not found inscribed in the immortal archives of that illustrious regiment— Thank you , sir—one penny , sir , and five will make—yes , sir , sixpence—thank you , sir . Watch the moment the razor touches it . " While this exordium had been proceeding he had been wildly hacking his bit of wood with the glittering blade—then he exhibited its edge woefully notched—then he anointed his strop with some of the unguent from the boxes he was purveying—
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
A Queer Career.
or tried to whop , Her Majesty ' s " Snappers and Grinders , " if they could find occasion to make a quarrel , which , be assured , was no difficult matter , whenever , whether at Woolwich or Chatham , or elsewhere , Queen's Service Sappers encountered the Engineers of John Company . HE was in a coatee . He had two large golden epaulettes . He wore the orthodox
broad-spreading-at-the-top ostentatious peak-shading-at-the-base shako . Mr . Mole had the inverted stripes of a staff-sergeant on his arm , and he carried a rattan , the privilege of his non-commissioned rank . He beamed airily upon me as if he recognised one he had seen somewhere before ; but he cast languishing glances at the demure servant maids of the St . Margaret ' s Bank establishments , aud obviously , to employ an oriental metaphor , their hearts " melted as water before the warmth of lord ' s smile . "
my I didn't find my friend the purser's clerk , but I did eat good cheesecakes at the " Eose " at Sittingbourne—the world-renowned speciality of that long since nonexistent hostelry—that night , to which I had carried nine miles more white Kentish dust , and I forgot all about Mr . Mole until—until our next encounter .
And ever after that interview he wore the chimney-pot capital I have heretofore described . This is the last time , dear and patient reader , you shall behold him without that churchwarden or dissenting-minister-like voucher of indisputable respectability . On this occasion he had covered his nut with a pork pie , or—so-called—polo , head gear , and he was addressing a numerous and admiring audience in the New Cut ; Lambeth . It was early in ' 51 , the Exhibition year . I am sure I don't know what took me to
that aristocratic South London thoroughfare . Perhaps I was wending my way to a temperance meeting in the Westminister Bridge road . Probably I was seeking spiritual consolation at the late Mr . Eowland Hill's Tabernacle , over against the gilded clog licking out the golden pot—the hundreds of years old "dog and pot "—in the way leading to the whilom Magdalen , and the still standing Obelisk . Ascribe to me any dissipated intentions you pleaseanyhow it was Saturday nihtand it was in the New
, g , Cut , and there was a crowd ! Now , if there is one temptation of London street life I never COULD resist , it is a crowd . What is it all about ? I must know . I elbow my way in . If it ' s an argument , I take a part in it . If it's a sight , I look on and applaud . If it ' s " Punch , " I grin , and cheerfully give my penny . If it ' s a fight , I—well , sometimes—interpose between the stripped ' gladiators—take each athlete by the throat—announce that I am a metropolitan
ratepayer—invoke the vestry , the Board of Works , the police and the authorities generally , and pose as Ajax defying the lightning . But this particular crowd was quite amicable . It was clustered around an individual who was civilian as to all parts of his garb but his head covering , and that was adorned by an unmistakable forage or stable cap . It was my acquaintance , Mr . Mole . He occasionally produced from his waistcoat pocket certain diminutive pill boxes—he very ostentatiously displayed a black-handled razor , a strop , and a jagged piece of deal wood —and this is the way in which he addressed his numerous and obviously admiring auditory , —
" Gentlemen , —for it would be in vain to appeal to the sympathies of the softer sex , in a matter in which , by the immutable laws of nature , they cannot be interested , —I am no common man ! I hold in my hand an implement—of domestic—ordinary domestic—employment , commonly termed—a—a—razor ! Gentlemen , the hand which now brandishes this weapon knows little about such plebeian tools . No , gentlemen , I am more accustomed to the use of a car-r-r-bine—a lance—or a swo-r-r-rd . I do not
boast . Let the Gazettes which record—alas ! inadequately record—the exploits of Ferozeshah , Sobraon and Aliwal be consulted , and if the name of "Vi gilance Jollybodycorporal of the 16 th Lancers—be not found inscribed in the immortal archives of that illustrious regiment— Thank you , sir—one penny , sir , and five will make—yes , sir , sixpence—thank you , sir . Watch the moment the razor touches it . " While this exordium had been proceeding he had been wildly hacking his bit of wood with the glittering blade—then he exhibited its edge woefully notched—then he anointed his strop with some of the unguent from the boxes he was purveying—