Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
How I Was First Prepared To Be Made A Mason.
. shoulders of fair as well as stern precisians . From an adjacent cottage emerges a poor washerwoman , bearing a by no means plump nursling , and seeks to propitiate the nearest trooper by depositing it on his saddle bow . " Good sir , spare a poor woman ' s few sticks , in God ' s blessed name , and here , sir , is a trifle for you . Perhaps you have had no breakfast . We all know that you eat babies , ancl you needn't mind taking this one , for he ' s only a nurse child , and there ' s a year ' s board owing for him , and the Lord onl y
knows whether I shall ever get paid !" Si von vero e hen trovato . But to return to our muttons , or rather our babies . The fair craftswoman ' s enquiry having been answered in the affirmative , the past mistresses retired to make the necessary preparations for the reception of the unenlightened , ancl on their return , that numerous body were relegated to a convenient room adjoining the lodge , which , in this instance , was the hall , and we were all formed up
en queue , as they arrange you at the entrances to French theatres , outside the diningroom door , for in that salle a manger the lodge was then being opened in due form . Now if you suppose that I am about to betray the secrets entrusted to me on that eventful occasion , you form a very erroneous conception of what I regard as honourable principle ; but I will tell you all I dare ; all that a scrupulous regard for the dut y entailed by my obligation will permit . If any curious or enterprising reader desires to know more , let him communicate with me through the publisher , cheques crossed London Joint Stock .
i'lns , however , I may say , and seriously say , imprimis , that the game tinned . out to be a perfectly pure , harmless , juvenile bit of fun . There was nothing coarse about it .. In no conventional sense do I say , in no apologetic tone need I urge , Honi soil qui mal y pense . That eminent authority on morals , Mr . Podsnap himself , had he been present , could not have detected in it the slightest tendency to produce that culmination of domestic perfidy , which he euphemised as " calling up the blush to the -cheek of the young person . " It was a sport in which both sexes couldand didwith
, , perfect propriety and modesty , take part , in that blessed season which has so long been , . and long may it continue to be , consecrate to innocent mirth . You will have observed , gentle reader , that a few-lines ago I introduced the subject ¦ of a baby with an adroit reference to a kettle . Now this was not clone without desi gn , as you will presently perceive , for , while we were waiting without the door of the lodge , and a little uneasy at the sounds proceeding from withinwhere the craftswomen
, appeared to be fighting each other , using the fire-irons as weapons—conveying quite a different idea to our minds from that of love and harmony , which we had an indistinct notion even then should characterise the members of the craft—while we were waiting , as I say—one of tho brethren—I beg pardon—sisters , emerged with much mystery , only opening the portal sufficiently wide to enable her slim body to pass , carefully
managing so that none of the expectant queue should get a glimpse , through the aperture , of the interior of the apartment , and , carefully closing the door after her , propounded the very question asked by the Scottish visitor , "Is there a kettle in the house ? " Well , there was no great difficulty in providing a culinary utensil of that tolerably ordinary character , and presently it was carried through the crowd , and , with the same precautions as attended the egress of the bearer , introduced to the lodge . Certainly the
fair members seemed very uneasy within , and their wants numerous . Charcoal , for instance , was required . The house was searched—fortunately with success—for a piece of chalk , soap , sponges , basins , cold water , —all were conveyed into the lodge , with the same solemnity and mystery ; then came that , according to tradition , indispensable " property " of an initiation , a tremendous poker , procured from the kitchen ; but what puzzled the postulants more than anything else was an excursion which one of the
ministering priestesses made to some upper apartment , whence she descended bearing goodly store of spotless white robes , of delicate priceless lace , of snowy toilet napery , all of which the portals of the mysterious chamber stealthily , silently , but greedily absorbed . Stop ! did I say silently ? I recall the word . The very mischief—whatever that may mean—appeared to be going on inside . The expression " an infernal row " sounds so suspiciously like using an expletive , that it is at all events open to the objection of
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
How I Was First Prepared To Be Made A Mason.
. shoulders of fair as well as stern precisians . From an adjacent cottage emerges a poor washerwoman , bearing a by no means plump nursling , and seeks to propitiate the nearest trooper by depositing it on his saddle bow . " Good sir , spare a poor woman ' s few sticks , in God ' s blessed name , and here , sir , is a trifle for you . Perhaps you have had no breakfast . We all know that you eat babies , ancl you needn't mind taking this one , for he ' s only a nurse child , and there ' s a year ' s board owing for him , and the Lord onl y
knows whether I shall ever get paid !" Si von vero e hen trovato . But to return to our muttons , or rather our babies . The fair craftswoman ' s enquiry having been answered in the affirmative , the past mistresses retired to make the necessary preparations for the reception of the unenlightened , ancl on their return , that numerous body were relegated to a convenient room adjoining the lodge , which , in this instance , was the hall , and we were all formed up
en queue , as they arrange you at the entrances to French theatres , outside the diningroom door , for in that salle a manger the lodge was then being opened in due form . Now if you suppose that I am about to betray the secrets entrusted to me on that eventful occasion , you form a very erroneous conception of what I regard as honourable principle ; but I will tell you all I dare ; all that a scrupulous regard for the dut y entailed by my obligation will permit . If any curious or enterprising reader desires to know more , let him communicate with me through the publisher , cheques crossed London Joint Stock .
i'lns , however , I may say , and seriously say , imprimis , that the game tinned . out to be a perfectly pure , harmless , juvenile bit of fun . There was nothing coarse about it .. In no conventional sense do I say , in no apologetic tone need I urge , Honi soil qui mal y pense . That eminent authority on morals , Mr . Podsnap himself , had he been present , could not have detected in it the slightest tendency to produce that culmination of domestic perfidy , which he euphemised as " calling up the blush to the -cheek of the young person . " It was a sport in which both sexes couldand didwith
, , perfect propriety and modesty , take part , in that blessed season which has so long been , . and long may it continue to be , consecrate to innocent mirth . You will have observed , gentle reader , that a few-lines ago I introduced the subject ¦ of a baby with an adroit reference to a kettle . Now this was not clone without desi gn , as you will presently perceive , for , while we were waiting without the door of the lodge , and a little uneasy at the sounds proceeding from withinwhere the craftswomen
, appeared to be fighting each other , using the fire-irons as weapons—conveying quite a different idea to our minds from that of love and harmony , which we had an indistinct notion even then should characterise the members of the craft—while we were waiting , as I say—one of tho brethren—I beg pardon—sisters , emerged with much mystery , only opening the portal sufficiently wide to enable her slim body to pass , carefully
managing so that none of the expectant queue should get a glimpse , through the aperture , of the interior of the apartment , and , carefully closing the door after her , propounded the very question asked by the Scottish visitor , "Is there a kettle in the house ? " Well , there was no great difficulty in providing a culinary utensil of that tolerably ordinary character , and presently it was carried through the crowd , and , with the same precautions as attended the egress of the bearer , introduced to the lodge . Certainly the
fair members seemed very uneasy within , and their wants numerous . Charcoal , for instance , was required . The house was searched—fortunately with success—for a piece of chalk , soap , sponges , basins , cold water , —all were conveyed into the lodge , with the same solemnity and mystery ; then came that , according to tradition , indispensable " property " of an initiation , a tremendous poker , procured from the kitchen ; but what puzzled the postulants more than anything else was an excursion which one of the
ministering priestesses made to some upper apartment , whence she descended bearing goodly store of spotless white robes , of delicate priceless lace , of snowy toilet napery , all of which the portals of the mysterious chamber stealthily , silently , but greedily absorbed . Stop ! did I say silently ? I recall the word . The very mischief—whatever that may mean—appeared to be going on inside . The expression " an infernal row " sounds so suspiciously like using an expletive , that it is at all events open to the objection of