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  • June 1, 1879
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    Article HOW I WAS FIRST PREPARED TO BE MADE A MASON. ← Page 3 of 9 →
Page 85

Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.

How I Was First Prepared To Be Made A Mason.

inelegance , and yet I know of no other term to describe the bourdonnement , the sound of which was—not wafted to but—banged into our ears . And yet " row " is a very expressive word , and the expletory adjective only suggests such a chamaillis as the spiritual creatures with whom we imaginatively people the place we , by a wholly incorrect euphemism , term Hades , may be supposed to be in the normal habit of making . I once read a very ghastly but expressive illustration of uproar , but then the clangour was

supposed to proceed from supernatural causes . '" They make a noise , ' said the old sexton , ' just as if they was ghostes a playing at skittles with their own dead bones . '" But here the concussions appeared to be produced by metallic rather than osseous machinery . Fancy the clanking that Jacob Marley ' s ghost ' s adornment of cash-boxes and iron safes made when BIr . Scrooge was so frightened ; only imagine it much more staccato , more strongly accentuated , emphasised , and multiply it , to bo moderate , say by twenty , and you will have some idea of the clangour that affrighted our juvenile souls as we stood outside those grim panels , tremblingly wondering what was to happen .

It wasn't my turn to go in first , I remember . One of the hierophants emerged with the mystery that seemed absolutely de rigueur , and seized upon the victim nearest the door as her prey . He was very long ancl very lanky—one of those stupid hoys who at seventeen seem to have left off growing intellectually at seven , and to have sought to compensate for that abstinence by running on into any amount of physical elongation . I believe in those days a gentleman by the name of Calcraft fulfilled an important office in the chief executive of the law . Of course I ought never to have read of such

things , but I am afraid the penny dreadfuls of the present day had their antitypes in the fourth decade of this century , and somehow I had acquired an idea of the delicate yet firm manner in which the deemster approached the law ' s forfeit at the supreme moment , and for the life of me I couldn't help connecting Polly Prattleton ' s appropriation of trembling and , I rather think , boo-hooing Tommy Twistler , with a certain grim ceremony then rather too frequently performed on a Monday morning in a gloomy apartment denominated the Press-room , and situate within a well known grim stone edifice , near the centre of the city of London .

The first operation performed upon Tommy , and which , I verily believe , produced the boo-hooing aforesaid , consisted in blindfolding that martyr with his own not overclean kerchief . Then the mysterious portal opened and closed upon the candidate and his conductress , and suddenly the turmoil ceased , and a sdence that might be felt reigned within and without—a silence broken after the lapse of a few seconds by shrieks and yells of—yes—demoniac laughter , proceeding from within , in the midst of which the door gapes again to receive another hood-winked aspirant—this time of the fair sex—and tho . same sequence follows of awesome silence ruptured by spasmodic explosions of mirth .

Ihe victims did not re-appear ! Each succeeding burst of hilarity was enhanced by another personal contribution to the cachinnation . Can you recall Lamartine's wonderful description of the death song of the Girondists ? Well , the effect here was inverse to that . If you remember , the twenty-two marched to the scaffold singing the " Marseillaise " as with one voice . Number one is strapped to the board , which is forthwith inverted , the moribund one still singing with the rest . There is a flash , and a chop , and a thudas a head rolls into the basketancl only twent- one voices are left chanting the

refrain-, , y , and the warbling throat of one of these is even then being embraced by the lunette , and then the flash , etc ., etc ., etc ., and there is a warbler the less , but the twenty are still " giving it mouth , " and so on , and so on , and so on , until only one set of vocal apparatus is left to incite to allonging and marchonging , as Dickens's unimaginative Briton phrases it . A second more and there is complete silence . There diminuendo—here crescendoas the still increasing roar resounds from withinAt last came turn

, . my .-With faltering voice I professed my willingness to undergo the ordeal . With beating heart I submitted to the tender but ready hands of my conductress as the fatal bandage excluded the light , and then—and then—ancl then ! Now I should have told you that it was adroitly but diabolically contrived that between the hood-winking process aforementioned and the actual reception into the

“The Masonic Magazine: 1879-06-01, Page 85” Masonic Periodicals Online, Library and Museum of Freemasonry, 11 May 2025, django:8000/periodicals/mmg/issues/mmg_01061879/page/85/.
  • List
  • Grid
Title Category Page
TRANSMISSION OF MASONIC ART AND SYMBOLISM IN THE FOURTH CENTURY. Article 1
A QUEER CAREER. Article 6
THE PAST. Article 18
A PERFECTLY AWFULLY LOVELY POEM. Article 19
TO ARTHUR . Article 20
ARE YOU A MASTER MASON ? Article 21
THE LITERARY EXPERIENCES OF A YOUNG MAN WITH A FUTURE. Article 26
HERMES TRISMEGISTUS. Article 27
A CATALOGUE OF MASONIC BOOKS IN THE BRITISH MUSEUM. Article 29
NOTES ON LITERATURE, SCIENCE, AND ART. Article 36
GOTHIC ARCHITECTURE.* Article 42
ST. ALBAN'S CATHEDRAL. Article 46
TO HOPE. Article 48
THE DEPUTY GRAND MASTER OF ENGLAND. Article 49
CATHERINE CARMICHAEL; on, THREE YEARS RUNNING. Article 50
CHRISTMAS, 1878. Article 64
SONNET. Article 65
LIST OF "ANCIENT LODGES," 1813, WITH THEIR NUMBERS IN 1814, 1832, AND 1863. Article 66
THREE CHRISTMAS EVES. Article 73
GRADUS AD OPUS CAEMENTITIUM. Article 80
HOW I WAS FIRST PREPARED TO BE MADE A MASON. Article 83
CHRISTMAS DAY ON BOARD HER MAJESTY'S SHIP "NONSUCH." Article 92
A PHILOLOGICAL FANCY Article 95
ALONE. Article 97
DESCRIPTION OF A CHURCH SITUATED IN FORT MANOEL, MALTA, IN WHICH ARE SEVERAL INTERESTING MASONIC ILLUSTRATIONS. Article 98
THE LOVING CUP: OR, HOW THE DUSTMEN WERE DIDDLED. Article 102
A CHRISTMAS DAY BEFORE THE ENEMY. Article 105
GERMAN MASONIC TEACHING ONE HUNDRED YEARS AGO. Article 108
A MEMORY. Article 111
ROB MOORSON. Article 112
PARTED. Article 120
THE MAP OF EUROPE IN 1879. Article 121
SOME ACCOUNT OF THE LODGE OF ANTIQUITY, NO. 146, BOLTON. Article 124
AN UNKNOWN WATERING-PLACE. Article 127
SHAKSPERE, HIS FRIENDS AND ACQUAINTANCES. Article 131
SKETCHES OF CHARACTER. Article 138
SONNET. Article 139
THE VOLITATIONIST. Article 139
A SIMILE. Article 144
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Page 85

Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.

How I Was First Prepared To Be Made A Mason.

inelegance , and yet I know of no other term to describe the bourdonnement , the sound of which was—not wafted to but—banged into our ears . And yet " row " is a very expressive word , and the expletory adjective only suggests such a chamaillis as the spiritual creatures with whom we imaginatively people the place we , by a wholly incorrect euphemism , term Hades , may be supposed to be in the normal habit of making . I once read a very ghastly but expressive illustration of uproar , but then the clangour was

supposed to proceed from supernatural causes . '" They make a noise , ' said the old sexton , ' just as if they was ghostes a playing at skittles with their own dead bones . '" But here the concussions appeared to be produced by metallic rather than osseous machinery . Fancy the clanking that Jacob Marley ' s ghost ' s adornment of cash-boxes and iron safes made when BIr . Scrooge was so frightened ; only imagine it much more staccato , more strongly accentuated , emphasised , and multiply it , to bo moderate , say by twenty , and you will have some idea of the clangour that affrighted our juvenile souls as we stood outside those grim panels , tremblingly wondering what was to happen .

It wasn't my turn to go in first , I remember . One of the hierophants emerged with the mystery that seemed absolutely de rigueur , and seized upon the victim nearest the door as her prey . He was very long ancl very lanky—one of those stupid hoys who at seventeen seem to have left off growing intellectually at seven , and to have sought to compensate for that abstinence by running on into any amount of physical elongation . I believe in those days a gentleman by the name of Calcraft fulfilled an important office in the chief executive of the law . Of course I ought never to have read of such

things , but I am afraid the penny dreadfuls of the present day had their antitypes in the fourth decade of this century , and somehow I had acquired an idea of the delicate yet firm manner in which the deemster approached the law ' s forfeit at the supreme moment , and for the life of me I couldn't help connecting Polly Prattleton ' s appropriation of trembling and , I rather think , boo-hooing Tommy Twistler , with a certain grim ceremony then rather too frequently performed on a Monday morning in a gloomy apartment denominated the Press-room , and situate within a well known grim stone edifice , near the centre of the city of London .

The first operation performed upon Tommy , and which , I verily believe , produced the boo-hooing aforesaid , consisted in blindfolding that martyr with his own not overclean kerchief . Then the mysterious portal opened and closed upon the candidate and his conductress , and suddenly the turmoil ceased , and a sdence that might be felt reigned within and without—a silence broken after the lapse of a few seconds by shrieks and yells of—yes—demoniac laughter , proceeding from within , in the midst of which the door gapes again to receive another hood-winked aspirant—this time of the fair sex—and tho . same sequence follows of awesome silence ruptured by spasmodic explosions of mirth .

Ihe victims did not re-appear ! Each succeeding burst of hilarity was enhanced by another personal contribution to the cachinnation . Can you recall Lamartine's wonderful description of the death song of the Girondists ? Well , the effect here was inverse to that . If you remember , the twenty-two marched to the scaffold singing the " Marseillaise " as with one voice . Number one is strapped to the board , which is forthwith inverted , the moribund one still singing with the rest . There is a flash , and a chop , and a thudas a head rolls into the basketancl only twent- one voices are left chanting the

refrain-, , y , and the warbling throat of one of these is even then being embraced by the lunette , and then the flash , etc ., etc ., etc ., and there is a warbler the less , but the twenty are still " giving it mouth , " and so on , and so on , and so on , until only one set of vocal apparatus is left to incite to allonging and marchonging , as Dickens's unimaginative Briton phrases it . A second more and there is complete silence . There diminuendo—here crescendoas the still increasing roar resounds from withinAt last came turn

, . my .-With faltering voice I professed my willingness to undergo the ordeal . With beating heart I submitted to the tender but ready hands of my conductress as the fatal bandage excluded the light , and then—and then—ancl then ! Now I should have told you that it was adroitly but diabolically contrived that between the hood-winking process aforementioned and the actual reception into the

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