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Article AN ALLEGORY. ← Page 4 of 8 →
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An Allegory.
scholarly acquirements , he must nevertheless have exercised a great deal of thoughtful consideration , or he would never have had the faculty of hitting the ri ght nail on the head . The Right Hon . Ta . tus gave me much food for consideration in a quiet , gentlemanly way , and delicately suggested that as I might occasionally have to have my wits about me , it would be as well for me to see the Right Hon . Witieus . Passing , therefore , into the next room , I f omicl myself in the presence of the Right
Hon . Witieus . He impressed me as I looked at him with a variety of emotions . Sometimes the expression of his face had such a look of ridiculous merriment that I could barely keep my countenance , ancl at other times his eyes twinkled so horribly maliciously that I thought the two letters in the alphabet most serviceable for me to remember would be my p ' s ancl q ' s . The Right Hon . Witicns , however , received me pleasantly , and asked me how I . was- getting on . " ! , " ¦ said ho , " found it somewhat strange at first , for here you live on air , whilst heretofore I lived upon my wits . "
I ventured to ask him if he ever fared sumptuously on his wits . '" No , " replied he ; " it is only a contented miud knows how to feast . " I couldn't hel p feeling somewhat curious to know how it was possible to live ou one ' s wits , and frankly expressed my curiosity . " There are various ways , " replied he . " One of the most prevalent is that of devising schemes by which the advantage to be accrued turns out to have been all on one side . Ton see that box over there ? " said he ,
indicating an elaborate money-box , that seemed to be all mahogany ancl brass plate . 1 looked at the box in question , and on the brass plate was engraved , " The Bankwarranted to give the most interest . " " Perhaps , " said the Right Hon . Witieus blandly , " you woidd like to put your money in a money-box !" Being of a trustful nature myselfit did not occur to me to ask the Riht Hon
, g . Witieus , in the face of such an assertion as the brass plate contained , if the box was soundly made , consequently I congratulated myself what a capital thing it would be to put it where I could get the most interest , —consequently I dropped my coins into " The Bank . " The Right Hon . Witieus then took the box out of my reach ; but as he was moving it the bottom fell out and the money with it , which the Right Hon . Witieus picked up ancl pocketed .
I candidly confess that this proceeding did give a great deal of interest indeed ; ancl when I demanded an explanation , the Right Hon . Witieus smilingly told me the screws were too loose for the box , " ancl , " said he , elaborately ancl grandly , " I regret to inform you we shall not be able to declare a dividend . ' If , " said , he , "I can offer you any consolation on the termination of this most unfortunate affair , I can only say we all of us more or less have to pay for our experience . "
I . thought , though I was polite enough not to say so , that I at all events had had to pay for my experience . " Racing ancl gambling , " continued he , " offer great inducements to ready wits—so much so that there are many practices connected with those matters too disreputable to be mentioned , ancl it is to the credit of the young idea to be ignorant of them altogether . Li using my wit" continued the Riht Hon . Witieus" I have laughed foibles
, g , away , delusions ,. ancl eccentricities . I have made clulness sparkle ancl gravity . smile . I have corrected oddities ancl peculiarities . I have brought out a man ' s best part , and in selfdefence have exposed weak points . I have ridiculed unmercifully conceits and shams . I have caricatured all would-be characters . I have cracked jokes ancl distorted words . I have brought forth laughter , and stung too deep for tears ' . I have been flattered ancl courted as well as hated ancl feared . "
As I took my leave of the Right Hon . Witieus , he said , " Allow me to introduce you to an Utopian practice of restoring your coins , ancl suggest that you see my friend the Ri ght Hon . Pruclentus . " Before the Right Hon . Pruclentus could receive me I was informed it was necessary for me to present a credential , consequently I mentioned I was there by the instigation of the Ri ght Hon . Knowledges , whose name at once procured me an audience . The Right Hon . Prttdentus appeared to me to be an exceedingly plain , precise sort of
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
An Allegory.
scholarly acquirements , he must nevertheless have exercised a great deal of thoughtful consideration , or he would never have had the faculty of hitting the ri ght nail on the head . The Right Hon . Ta . tus gave me much food for consideration in a quiet , gentlemanly way , and delicately suggested that as I might occasionally have to have my wits about me , it would be as well for me to see the Right Hon . Witieus . Passing , therefore , into the next room , I f omicl myself in the presence of the Right
Hon . Witieus . He impressed me as I looked at him with a variety of emotions . Sometimes the expression of his face had such a look of ridiculous merriment that I could barely keep my countenance , ancl at other times his eyes twinkled so horribly maliciously that I thought the two letters in the alphabet most serviceable for me to remember would be my p ' s ancl q ' s . The Right Hon . Witicns , however , received me pleasantly , and asked me how I . was- getting on . " ! , " ¦ said ho , " found it somewhat strange at first , for here you live on air , whilst heretofore I lived upon my wits . "
I ventured to ask him if he ever fared sumptuously on his wits . '" No , " replied he ; " it is only a contented miud knows how to feast . " I couldn't hel p feeling somewhat curious to know how it was possible to live ou one ' s wits , and frankly expressed my curiosity . " There are various ways , " replied he . " One of the most prevalent is that of devising schemes by which the advantage to be accrued turns out to have been all on one side . Ton see that box over there ? " said he ,
indicating an elaborate money-box , that seemed to be all mahogany ancl brass plate . 1 looked at the box in question , and on the brass plate was engraved , " The Bankwarranted to give the most interest . " " Perhaps , " said the Right Hon . Witieus blandly , " you woidd like to put your money in a money-box !" Being of a trustful nature myselfit did not occur to me to ask the Riht Hon
, g . Witieus , in the face of such an assertion as the brass plate contained , if the box was soundly made , consequently I congratulated myself what a capital thing it would be to put it where I could get the most interest , —consequently I dropped my coins into " The Bank . " The Right Hon . Witieus then took the box out of my reach ; but as he was moving it the bottom fell out and the money with it , which the Right Hon . Witieus picked up ancl pocketed .
I candidly confess that this proceeding did give a great deal of interest indeed ; ancl when I demanded an explanation , the Right Hon . Witieus smilingly told me the screws were too loose for the box , " ancl , " said he , elaborately ancl grandly , " I regret to inform you we shall not be able to declare a dividend . ' If , " said , he , "I can offer you any consolation on the termination of this most unfortunate affair , I can only say we all of us more or less have to pay for our experience . "
I . thought , though I was polite enough not to say so , that I at all events had had to pay for my experience . " Racing ancl gambling , " continued he , " offer great inducements to ready wits—so much so that there are many practices connected with those matters too disreputable to be mentioned , ancl it is to the credit of the young idea to be ignorant of them altogether . Li using my wit" continued the Riht Hon . Witieus" I have laughed foibles
, g , away , delusions ,. ancl eccentricities . I have made clulness sparkle ancl gravity . smile . I have corrected oddities ancl peculiarities . I have brought out a man ' s best part , and in selfdefence have exposed weak points . I have ridiculed unmercifully conceits and shams . I have caricatured all would-be characters . I have cracked jokes ancl distorted words . I have brought forth laughter , and stung too deep for tears ' . I have been flattered ancl courted as well as hated ancl feared . "
As I took my leave of the Right Hon . Witieus , he said , " Allow me to introduce you to an Utopian practice of restoring your coins , ancl suggest that you see my friend the Ri ght Hon . Pruclentus . " Before the Right Hon . Pruclentus could receive me I was informed it was necessary for me to present a credential , consequently I mentioned I was there by the instigation of the Ri ght Hon . Knowledges , whose name at once procured me an audience . The Right Hon . Prttdentus appeared to me to be an exceedingly plain , precise sort of