Mr. Sprechelheimer's Mistake.

MR . SPRECHELHEIMER'S MISTAKE .

BY W . AV . CEANE . From"Scribner ' sAmerican Monthly " " I dells you now , vot happen voss In mine shop hier , last veek . Ve voss all vorkin , hants aud poss , A shafin men reit kveek .

Unci dann , vun noder man in-coom , Und set a vaitin hier ; Dann say , a-lookin' rount der room ; ' Ussistnock nicktol p feer . ' " I say , not hearin' him reit glear ; ' Sir , vot you voss say blease . '

He say : ' Ussistnock nicktolp feer ' Und dann he rup his knees . " I dries to make dot lankvich out So hart oss I can dry ; I dooms clem kveer vorts all apowt ; Dinks : ' How iss dot py high 1

"So dann , insite mineself , I say ; ' Dies muss franzosisch sein . ' Ohd dann I dinks , too , reit avay :

Gut I hier 1 st Friedrich Klein . ' " Der Friedrich iss vun Elsass man , TJnd can French vorts goot say . ' Fritz , is deess French ? ' I ask him claim , - " ¦ Dot man shvear , reit avay 1 " He say he voss talk jry der rule

( Blain English , now he shpeak ) ; He dolt me I voss vun Dutch fool , Dann owt vent pooty kveek . " Now all dot day I dinks mit me ; ' Vot make dot man git mat ? TJnd vot for lankvich can dot be ?' TJnd dann I feels reit hat .

" Fritz say dem vorts dey voss not French , Und dann I clinks some more . I sits down jiy der bier-house pench Und looks down mit der floor . " Und , all off vunce , I ondershtau Vot dot man mean to say !

He voss a Cherman-learning man , Shoost gittin' in der vay 1 " Und vot he say oss blain oss day To me did dann abbear ; To show his Cherman off he say ; 'JSs 1 st noch nicht halb vier . '

" Now after deess , if manss ooom hiei Unci talk dot vay mit me . I shoost make out it iss all glear Und dey will nefer see .

Mr. Sprechelheimer's Mistake.

"I say , reit off : 'Mem lieber Hen , Sic sprcchen gut und klar 1 Your Cherman is teep-top , I shvear 1 Main Gott ' s istuunderbar f "

Double Acrostic.

DOUBLE ACROSTIC .

No . I . To the Editor of the MASONIC MAGAZINE . HE does unto the Craft belong , To him we scanty honour give ; To scorn him would be doing wron ° -

, I wish he would more useful live . 1 . The solemn strains ascend on high , 'Mongst mourners sad—no eye is dry ; '

The Master Art holds all spell-bound , As each one hears the plaintive sound . 2 . A pleasant spot wherein to dwell , Is that of which some poets tell

. But , oh ! alas ! I much do fear That lovely land is noway here . 3 . If , worthy Mason , this could be , Angelic man we then might see . doubt

I if on this earth so round A man so perfect can be found . i . A boat came nigh a mi ghty ship , And something from its stem did m , Sli p ' Then came a crash—a frightful roar , The noble shi p was seen no more .

5 . Midst arctic regions / was spun , The spinning caused some merry fun , And wond ' rous ' twas to old and young The spinner onl y used his tongue . * R . SIMMONS .

Mildmay Road , Chelmsford , 23 rd Jul y , 1877 . [ We shall be happy to publish the names or initials of the guessers of the Acrostic , and will give the solution in the next number . —En . ]